»My Story - Krocktail

Hello whoever is reading this, today I'm going to explain what happened to me. People will not believe this what I'm going to tell, but that's their problem.
First of all yes the rumors about me were true and false.

I was not happy at all, the people I loved were gone forever and didnt had much social contact anymore the last weeks. All these reasons made me thinking that I'm maybe not worth it to be here.
When you think something like that, you gonna think more and more about it when it kinda controlls you. The thing which made my mind crazy was that my own blood brother told to a friend that
he wanted that I never existed, we had a fight before, i was so hopeless and didn't saw any way out so I thought suicide was the best option.

This is unbelievable hard to tell without getting a flashback of what I did, typing this all is making me so sad that I can't send it but to accept what i did, I need to face it to recover. So here we go.
The day when I heard what my brother said, I went to my room where I thought about it for hours. My deciscion was clear in my eyes i had nothing to live for.

Some friends also knew that I wasn't happy anymore and talking suicidal so they were worried I think so they called my brother and he immediately ran to my room where he saw me hanging on a rope,
He pulled me of and called 112 (emergency). I knew this when I woke up, my brother was beside me and told me this all, I couldn't imagine that he still was worried about me. But what I didnt know was that
they kept me in a coma for 2 days to let me body recover. This made me so sad, I wasn't ready to continue with live yet so I had support of many friends but I also lost many friends.

I believe I need to tell this, you guys deserve the truth. Now i'm feeling a bit better after staying home for 2 months. I still have alot of problems to solve but hopefully i'm not alone anymore.
I did act that I had a perfect life which wasn't. Alot people who I loved are gone and that made me rot.
I know this post will get hate and I don't blame you for it, I'm also mad at myself. I just hope that I continue with my life.

Typing this all down is incredibly hard for me without showing any emotion. I hope you guys understand a bit how I felt and that I didn't saw a way out.
Not sure If I will play Guildcraft again but I want to give it a shot but it requires time. I played Guildcraft 2 minutes and already got alot of hate which I clearly understand but it makes me it hard to post this.

I decided yesterday to look at discord for the first time since it all happened and got alot messages of people i didn't expect i would get from. I'm so thankful for that.
I hope I didn't cause to much trouble. I didnt want to create rumors or something. I had no motiviation to answer anything yet.

To make it all a bit smaller, i did suicide but I'm happy it failed because I know now what I could've lose.
1 thing is sure, what I did I will never forget and forgive. Life is made for great things.
I don't want to gain attention with this but I owe you guys an apology and you guys had the right to know it.

All you heard now is true and nothing of it is false. I'm not happy at al to tell this. I took me alot days to post this and alot of effort.

I hope I didn't hurt you guys too much. I'm so so sorry for the problems I created.
Krocktail

 

Its good you have told us this, We are here for you <3

 

will always be here for you man. I love u <3

 

Dont sweat it! You're fine and that's all that matters, hope the worst part is done and all that comes forward is the good part of your story ^-^.
Take a rest you REALLY deserved it!

 

I really feel bad for you and no you didn't seek for attention. It's good that you feel better now, you should never give up! Always stay positive and build your way up to success. Wishing you still best of luck.

 

you'd fucking cry if u could actually see the amount of people that are attracted to u and viceversa
<3

 

damn, no comment i hope you will feel better in the future. Just forget everything and start over again, good days will come for you too.

i wish you goodluck from now on

 

I hope things turn out for the better. I'm glad for your friends sake here that you're still with us

 

Stay strong! We love you, it's a tough experience to go through when you lose someone. I am glad you realized suicide isn't the option. Your brother loves you even if says to someone that he doesn't. My sister does it all the time and all I react with is "kiss my soft ass because I am staying here forever bitch so deal with it".

 

Krocktail! I don't know if you remember me but I remember you. You were (and are) one of the most beautiful people that could ever exist. It takes a lot of courage to post what you've been through. It's been a long time since we spoke to each other and I thought you just quit. I am extremly sorry/sad to hear what you've been through!!! I cannot believe! Krocktail, you don't need to apologise! Oh my god, I am so sorry to hear what you've been through... !! I just want you to remember one thing, and if you can't do it for yourself, do it for the ones who love you (which are a lot): Do not commit/try to suicide ever again. There's people that love you, even if you think you're worthless. What your brother said is really bad however, it may have been in a moment of anger. Also, **** the haters and **** whoever doesn't believe the story. I am so sorry. Have you tried to go to a psychologist or even talk to somebody? If you feel like they will not understand, just open notepad and kinda.. talk to notepad, or write rather. Make sure you be safe!!!! We do not judge you. We don't need any apologies.

We're just glad you're okay Krocktail!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
With much love, warcorp123.

 

Thanks for the kind words, Yes in the hospital was a local psychologist which helped me alot by facing what I did. She told me that telling your problems is the cure for everything so that's what I did. But thanks for support and I do remember you!

 

I'm so glad to hear from you dude! I was worried about you and your sudden disappearance. Just know that we're all here to support you in anyway we can. Get better soon man, and once again know that you can count on us for any support needed.

Stay safe

 

I’m really glad your okay, please don’t ever think for one millisecond that no one cares about you. If you ever need help, my DMs are open, even though you don’t know me that well. Feel free to message me anytime, I will respond as quickly as possible.

 

I perfectly know how it feel when you lose someone you love... I wish you the best luck in future and all the Guildcrafters are here for you, you're a really nice person.
We love you!

 

This is truly sad as f***. Even tho I'm a randy I hope ya'll the best @Dynasty !

 

Im Glad your alright Krock! Be safe and stay strong we are here for you <3!!

 

All this time I tought we had lost you... Im so glad you didn't leave us all! I really missed you (pretty sure wasn't the only one)... I have no words except that Im really happy.

PM me on Discord anytime man
ily<3

~Troz

 

Fuckk die haters, wees goed voor jezelf. Wij zijn er ook om je te steunen, al is het via internet!
~ Raba

 

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